What I learned about women from watching WC 101

[noracharles]

Women are there for you to enjoy! One of the good things about getting released from prison is that you get to use women. You can stare at them all you want, and if you put in the effort and flirt a bit with them, they'll try to please you and do stuff for you. Because that's what women are for.

Women's emotions don't matter, except for when they become a problem to you. A good wife will keep her emotions from bothering you, that's what makes her good. Sometimes women are just too emotional though, and that's when you have to solve the problem. If you just apply yourself to the problem, you can make it go away. You don't need to waste time during your marriage on getting to know your wife, because if she's a good wife, most of the time she won't trouble you with her emotions. On the rare occasions when you have to deal with the problem, you can just search through her possessions, and buy her a luxury item she wants.

Women are yours. If you're considering dating a woman, you should stalk her to see if she's good enough. She'll thank you later. If your wife is being problematical and having emotions, you should stalk her to try to solve the problem. She'll thank you for it. If a woman leaves you, you should stalk her and try to take her back. If a woman suspects you wouldn't stalk her if she left you, she'll think you don't value her as a possession, and then she might get emotional.

Women are at your disposition at all times. The only reason a woman has to turn you down is if she's a lesbian. Lesbianism is a waste of a sexy woman. Lesbians are lesbians just to thwart you. Lesbians want to be like you and wear hats and suits, because they know that you are better than women, but they also want to look sexy for you, as is only right. Even though you don't get to have sex with lesbians, they are there for you to stare at as much as you want.

Women come in two types: One type of woman is young, slim, has long, shiny, straight hair, wears a lot of make-up, wears figure-hugging clothing, wears high heels, flirts with you, and is there for you to stare at. The other type of woman is invisible, except when doing you a favor.

Women care about dumb stuff. You wouldn't care about your wedding anniversary, of course. The thought of a wife giving her husband a present on their anniversary, or a couple making plans together is just ludicrous, because why would you want to celebrate your relationship? But women sometimes have emotions for dumb reasons, and you need to solve that before it becomes a bigger problem.

Women, I tell you. They're a nuisance to deal with, but we still want to fuck them. Ammirite?

I also learned a politically correct tip from watching WC:

Don't say the d-word, it's offensive to little people! But it's okay to say "enano", because Hispanics don't watch TV, and if they do, who cares what they think anyway.

(Oh yeah, you better believe I'm going to be watching this show for the ho-yay.)

Comments

[klia]

There was nothing positive in this post. It was extremely negative, derisive, and snide, as are your comments to anyone who doesn't agree with you.

[noracharles]

No one has disagreed with my posts, though some people have implied that I'm enjoying the show "wrong". If I like the show, and like writing episode reactions/discussion posts, and this is a comm for people who like the show, and writing episode reactions/discussion posts is encouraged here, then how am I doing it wrong?

And you still haven't told me in what way I'm being "negative", so I don't know how you expect me to do better. Or maybe you don't, maybe you just like to point out stuff you don't like on the internet. Well, to each their own.

[klia]

No one has said "right" or "wrong," but when your "discussion" consists of pointing out -- heavily sarcastically and disparagingly -- the things you feel are wrong with the show and characters, and then posting snide replies to comments that didn't agree with you, you're pretty much the only person having fun.

So, while your posts aren't violating any comm rules, the way you're choosing to participate is discouraging others from doing so.

[noracharles]

1) I have pointed out things I think are wrong with the show.

True. I am a fan of the show, and this is a comm for fans of the show. The default assumption is that we like it. I don't know about you, but I have read a lot of episode reactions and squee both here on DW and on LJ. The common reaction seems to be that the show is fun, stylish and well cast.

I truly do not understand how my pointing out one single aspect of the show I find questionable, the obvious sexism, can feel like overwhelming negativity to anyone, or make them feel that speaking up about what they do like about the show would be cause for shock and disapproval.

When I labeled my post "discussion", I furthermore did not mean to mislead you into thinking I was writing an academic "discussion" of the type where you weigh pros and cons and contrast different opinions, and I don't know why you would expect that kind of post in a fan comm. I meant discussion post in the everyday sense, where one person states their own opinion, and then another person answers with their opinion.

2) I have used sarcasm.

Yes. So? Are you criticizing my tone? Are we going to play a fun game of silencing bingo?

3) I have disparaged... something.

Do you have a problem with me disparaging sexism?
Or do you feel that pointing out what the show is about is somehow disparaging? Well, brace yourself, here goes: White Collar is about a criminal and a cop working together, and the show is milking the clash of personalities and world views as much as it can. How did that make you feel?

4) There have been comments from people who didn't agree with me.

Have there? Because I've only received comments from dragonfly, who criticized my tone but did not contradict anything I've said; devilc, who criticized my tone but did not contradict anything I've said; you, who criticized my tone but did not contradict anything I've said; anatsuno and jmtorres who mainly agreed with me, and did not contradict anything I've said; snakeling who might disagree with me but didn't have time to contradict anything I've said; and last but not least solaciolum who, yes, did disagree with me and contradict me. So there has been a comment, if not "comments", disagreeing with me.

5) My replies to comments have been snide.

My reply to dragonfly was almost word for word the same as theirs to me. I believe that is equally snide. Will you be sending them a comment later, telling them to watch their tone?

My reply to devilc was a dry statement of the obvious, just as theirs was to me. I believe that is equally snide. Will you be sending them a comment later, telling them to watch their tone?

My replies to your snide, negative, derisive comments have been asking you to explain to me why you object to my posts, because I assume you're not hypocritical enough to disapprove of snide, negative and derisive comments just on principle.

My reply to solaciolum, the only commenter who disagreed with me, was friendly and polite.

6) I'm pretty much the only person having fun.

And what are anatsuno, jmtorres, snakeling and solaciolum, chopped liver? You don't have to like meta just because I do. Please feel free to filter my posts, I won't be offended. But don't pretend to speak for everyone when you tell me my posts are not appreciated.

7) My behavior is silencing others by discouraging them from participating.

Yes, I'm sure they're all shaking in their britches, thinking that if they dare post anything to this comm I will send them snide, negative, derisive comments telling them I disapprove of their tone.

[klia]

Enjoy the rest of your day. :)

[noracharles]

Thank you :-)
You too!